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Like Mags, I am registered blind, but have some residual vision in good light. I've been working at a college in Edinburgh now for many years, and always had a good rapport with the lads, and the office girls on the staff too, in particular, Elaine, a secretary in the planning department, who had a great sense of humour, and always smiling, was regularly battling against me in the piss taking league and wind ups.. So, it was the day of the staff party, and our own bar was open and well attended by several people who'd been enjoying the festive cheer for a few hours by the time I arrived.
To my amusement, there was Elaine, leaning on the bar, with her back to me, looking the worse for wear. So, I snuck up behind her, gently pinched her bum, made a chick chick sound through my cheeks, and said, "Hey you old slapper, fancy a quickie round the back of the school huts?"
...all innocent by the way, cos the wife is reading this too!...
Back to the story. At this point to my cringing horror, this luscious blonde swivelled round and looked me straight in my shocked colourless face, and said, "Well!, would there be anything else now you've managed to get my intimate attention?"
Yes, you've guessed it, Oh no, Jesus, it wasn't Elaine eh?, hehehehehehhe, It was the wife of a tutor who to my relief was a bit of a wimp and not six feet between the eyes. Luckily, the festive spirit came through and she smiled and saw the funny side of it, and I turned round to see Elaine leaning helpless against the wall, almost peeing her pants at my dilemma!
Needless to say, I had to endure a lot of piss taking for many years for that one, and oh yes, by the way, No Mags, I never did get round the back of the school huts yet!
ANOTHER GEM FROM ROBIN!
Keeping up with the trend.
In the early 70's when us lads had longer hair, it became a fashion to go to these more trendy hair salons to get the fancy treatment. My friend and I decided we'd try this out at a new one just opened, called Salon Henry, where we had to pre book our appointment, and not just turn up at the barbers shop and get the quick old short back and sides crew cut stuff.
So, we arrived just in time for our appointment, with the subtle lighting and the music playing, and the young lady invited me to the boothe as it was my turn for the treatment. Now, having never been in this kind of joint before, and not knowing the routine, with the big dentist type chair that you sit in, then it tilts back to the sink where you get the shampoo scene? I just shuffled across, put my knees up on the chair, leaned against the back, bent forward and stuck my head in the sink! heheheheheheheh, what a wally!
Got some stick for that one for a while too!